Diane Wimsatt
Mount Airy, Md 21771-7490
The Gazette
218 Main Street
Mount Airy, Md. 21771
Dear Gazette,
In response to Dr. Teresa Shattuck’s questions for me in her letter on Jan. 22, “Disagreement over same-sex marriages,” I think that many who favor gay marriage do so because of anecdotal evidence (such as knowing a gay couple who seems happy) and emotionalism. I have had several male friends who were gay, one of whom had a child, and two who considered themselves a couple. Logically speaking, personal knowledge of the experience of one or more gay couples has nothing whatsoever to do with the issue of whether it is right or wrong, good for society, or good for the children involved. The decision to lead a gay life style is a totally selfish decision and is not made to benefit children or society. Of course, gays should not be harassed or treated unkindly. Gay people have human dignity, and I do not consider myself above them in any way. Additionally, the American public is being led to believe that those who choose a gay lifestyle should be a protected class. However, their behavior is immoral, and it is a dangerous idea to grant any behavior a protected status on a par with race, sex, or age. By setting up protections for behaviors, we are immediately creating an atmosphere of intolerance for those who disagree with those behaviors. Aren’t we trying to avoid intolerance? Those who are using “tolerance” as their reason for protecting homosexuality are attempting to force us to accept the behavior and, ultimately, to make it immoral to think homosexuality is wrong.
As I have now answered your questions, I have some for you. Let us first recognize that there are indeed many benefits to marriage, and that God ordained marriage to be between a man and woman. If all who are not married had the same rights as those who are married, what would be the point in having the institution of marriage at all? Why should gay couples be given the benefits of marriage when heterosexual couples who are not married do not receive those benefits? If we accept gay marriage, then why shouldn’t we accept polygamy, incest, or the ideas of the North American Man Boy Love Association (NAMBLA)? Where do we draw the line? Much evidence, including statistics and scientific research, prove that marriage between a man and a woman is good for society, individual adults, and children. Providing the benefits of marriage to those who are not truly married, erodes marriage as an institution.
There is much evidence that a gay relationship is not the same as a heterosexual relationship. You probably also know that the homosexual community is far less healthy than the general populace with STD’s, hepatitis and AIDS. One doctor has even called them “a wonderful mixed bag of diseases.” Are you familiar with the research showing that domestic disturbances among homosexuals (men in particular) are far more violent and frequent than in heterosexual relationships?
Are you familiar with the research of social scientists Linda Waite and Maggie Gallagher? In their book, The Case For Marriage, they lay out evidence that marriage between a man and a woman is not only beneficial for the partners, but is the best for children. Their research reveals that children from divorced families have a difficult time making and keeping lasting relationships. What additional difficulties will the children of gay couples have? Waite and Gallagher also make a good point that the decision to legalize gay marriage should not be based on scientific knowledge but “on religious and moral views about social justice and sexual morality.” They state that we do not have adequate scientific knowledge about long term gay relationships, and they imply that gay marriage is not a scientific issue. They also state that legalization of gay marriage is a “leap of faith”. If we do legalize gay marriage and discover that it was a mistake, how do we reverse course? I am convinced that it would be a terrible mistake and would bring about numerous negative consequences for society.
You correctly point out that “gays don’t wake up one day and decide to be gay”. Neither does the drug addict, the alcoholic, the abusive parent, or the habitually unfaithful spouse wake up one day to a choose a new addiction or weakness. These behaviors are not beneficial to individuals and are not acceptable in a healthy society. I support working to help folks caught in these behaviors. Thankfully, some wonderful organizations strive to offer help to homosexuals and have benefited many. My empathy for homosexuals does not change what is right.